True friends know which boundaries they shouldn’t cross when it comes to friendship. Not everyone agrees on the subject of dating your friends ex, is it reasonable to ask your friend to not date someone you were once involved with?
A loud NO I can imagine. But truly speaking what’s the problem with dating your friends ex man? There’s a number of “unspoken” rules in the guy and girl codes and the ex dating thing is one of them.
What’s the difference with a stranger and that person you know through your friend? Some say that it depends on how it ended? Really? What difference does the ending make? Do you need approval before even dating the dude or you just don’t even mention it? Or it’s ok when the gap between the friendship and relationship is wide enough, meaning before you became friends or 10years after their relationship ended?
Women are territorial, so whatever she has or has had or wants is off limits to her friends. This includes her exes. Honestly, how does one even look at their friend and confess to having an interest in their ex? A few women don’t mind this as they feel it’s her past and if her friend sees him in that light then they should go ahead, a really cool response in “all is good land.” Then there’s the rest of the women out there, no way in hell is a friend dating her ex.
It’s an uncomfortable situation watching an old flame do things with your friend in front of you. It’s even worse and awkward at gatherings when everyone is looking at the three of you hoping for some sort of drama to spice up the party. Ideal situations may come from the hookup but it’s really better to make things known with friends on these types of things, sit down and talk with your friend. Discuss matters such as exes and boundaries. We all want what’s best for our friends, their happiness is a concern therefore know each other’s limits.
By: Zanele Mash