We all know that there’s stages in friendships, changes are bound to take place with either one or both of you. The path may seem the same from a young age but as time goes on, people get married and have children while others stay single. Inevitably, a drift or distance is bound to happen where seeing each other every day becomes every weekend and so on till its once in a long while.
Through the stages I have mentioned, there are sure signs that it’s time to let go of a friendship.
They’re critical of you
Do they criticize the way you dress? Do they put you down for not doing things their way or the “perfect” way. That being said, do they talk about you to other people?
They seem to want to compete with you rather that support you
Do they make comments to you that highlight how “they did that better?” Did they manage to accomplish something but put you down for not doing the same? Do they try to take up your interests or hobbies in a way to try and “beat you” in some way.
Are they always asking you to do them favors? Do they owe you quite a bit of money but keep making up excuses not to pay you back? Are they always coming to you for help yet are never available when you need help?
They try to make moves in your partner
Or they start dating your ex and don’t discuss it with you first? Actions like this are a reflection of how much they truly value your friendship.
They lie to you.. A lot
A few little lies is one thing, but if there’s many then it negatively impacts the genuineness of the friendship. If your the type of person who values honesty, vulnerabity and creating depth in your relationships, then having a friend that chronically lies isn’t going to support you in that.
They don’t really support you
When your going through a tough time, are they there for you? Do they provide you with a good listening ear? Do they support you in your goals? Do they cheer you on in your endeavors and ask how you’ve been doing?
Finally, ask yourself the following questions: Why am I friends with this person? What do I gain by being friends with this person? What do I enjoy when being friends with this person?
If you can’t really answer those questions and a few or all of these five signs are true for you, then a legitimate breakup may be in order.
There you have it ladies, a friendship analysis is available.
By: Zanele Mash